Creating the Emotions That Make Your Event Unforgettable
If you’re going to create a memorable hospitality event, it’s important first to understand how the human memory works.
We remember things in images: a picture is worth 1000 words. When you think about your memories, they’re often a single image of something as it happened or a short “mental video clip” of the moment. They aren’t long, but your strongest memories are very clear and have remarkable detail. You can see the action and the key players, and you know exactly what was happening.
Our memories include our other senses, too: what we smelled at the event (the food, the flowers, the hotel’s cleaning fluids, perfumes and fragrances of the people around us) what we heard at the event (the music, the voices of the people around us, the volume of background chatter, and the sounds of clinking silverware), what we felt in a tactile way with our hands and our whole body (like temperature, humidity, wind, the proximity of other people, etc).
We also have an intellectual memory of the event. When you go to that memory, you know where you were, who was with you, what you were doing at the time, what was happening in your life at that time. If the memory is powerfully crafted, you remember who threw the party, too.
Underlying these two memories is a third type - the emotional memory of the event. This is how all of these experiences made you feel. A luxury hotel venue made you feel important and a valued guest of your host. You were seated next to a major company executive, who listened intently to your business problems and challenges during a break, which made you feel important and successful.
When people remember those key components, they’re able to talk about your event for days and months later. They can look forward to attending your next event. They will remember the people they met, so they’re more willing to answer their phone calls and open follow up messages. They can even remember important product information; particularly “what they get” messages like “saving money,” “spending more time with family,” and “doing what I want to do with my time.” (We’ll talk about connecting these memories to your brand and sales team in a later post).
So how do you make these memories so powerful and clear?
There are two important steps to making this happen. You must do both steps in order, and both steps are required. This is important - if you do this wrong, the result will be look weak and downright schmaltzy (but thankfully it won’t be particularly memorable).
Step Number One: You Must Create These Two Emotions
Emotion and memory go hand in hand. If your mind doesn’t attach an emotion to an experience, it doesn’t get remembered. If you think about your best memories, they’re full of emotions - happy, sad, angry, victory, defeat, safety, danger, fear, frustration, teamwork, connection, etc.
Emotion Number One: Connection
We have to feel connected to an event and the people at the event for our minds to decide to remember the event.
At the most memorable and persuasive events, people are actively engaged in the experience and emotionally connected to what is happening around them. Political rallies are a great example. In a divisive political climate, people often fear that sharing their political beliefs would be offensive to others. At rallies, people feel comfortable expressing themselves because all the other cheering, applauding people apparently hold the same political beliefs they do. The sense of connection lets the other emotions flow.
Event planners can do the same thing. Conferences, trade shows, and meetings can be lonely experiences. People are on the road, away from their families and friends, and they’re in a new environment surrounded by many people who are mostly strangers. People feel disconnected. There’s nothing worse than being at a party with no one to talk to.
Creating a “shared experience” like participating in a close-up magic performance or getting involved in a game can help open up your guests. Getting people involved and engaged in an event helps connect them to the other people at the event, starting conversations and building relationships.
People love cocktail parties where they feel like they know a lot of people - those parties go on for hours because everyone can comfortably float from conversation to conversation. They actually look forward to events that create connection at the conference because they know they’ll see people they know (even if that person is their sales representative or corporate host).
Emotion Number Two: Surprise
Surprise is the most powerful emotion for creating a memory. Psychologists agree that we remember things that we don’t expect more than anything else. If you’ve ever been so sure that you knew the answer on Jeopardy but Alex said you were wrong, you know exactly what I mean. In fact, you definitely know what you thought the answer was AND the correct answer. The surprise makes it stick in your head.
Surprising your guests with a celebrity speaker, large gift, large charitable donation, or major product announcement is a good way to sear the experience on their memory. Whatever you do has to be unexpected, emotionally interesting, and “one sentence simple.” The guest should be able to explain what happened in just one sentence. “They brought in Joe Montana to speak to us about focus” or “We donated $2 million to Alzheimer’s research at the event.”
The “surprise” emotion supercharges the memory. The moment is frozen in their minds through all five senses, as well as the emotions they were feeling at the time. They remember who they were with, what was happening, where they were, etc.
Step Number Two: Create a Memorable Story
People remember stories very well because we talk in stories. When we talk about something that happened, we tell the story in chronological order. We give background and context, and we tell the story of the experience “first this happened, and then…”
The most powerful stories are “first person” stories. These are things that happened to us, so we are emotionally involved in every moment of the story. We are engaged in the memory and we feel important when we tell people about what happened because we are the “star” of the memory.
When you’re choosing entertainment, try to see how your guests will generate first person stories: “I turned the card over - it was in my hand the whole time - and it changed!”
Be very careful of any entertainment that expects the audience to “sit there and watch me.” It’s much less memorable, there’s very little emotion tied to the experience, and the stories your guests will tell are much less compelling: “The aerialist did gymnastic moves on a trapeze.” At the very least, good speakers and entertainers should bond the audience together as a group, so everyone feels like they are engaged and participating in the event.
You can create a first person story about anything at your event. In a previous post, I listed some examples of first person stories about the venue, food and beverage, and entertainment. (Link)
Bonus: What Triggers the Memory?
When you’re creating the story guests will tell about your event, think about what will trigger that memory after the event, so guests have a reason to start talking about the experience they had with you. Just as the things we see and do are most memorable, when we see something that connects to the previous experience, the whole memory comes rushing back to us - the sensory impressions, the emotions we experienced, and the memory of the people who were with us at the time.
That’s one reason that seemingly “common” items make such a powerful impression on us when they are presented in a unique and different way. We see these things all the time, so our memories get triggered over and over again, which makes a deeper and stronger memory each time. Andy Warhol’s Cambell’s Soup can paintings are a great example. We think, “why would someone paint a picture of a can of soup?” When we see soup in our pantry, however, we find ourselves thinking of Warhol.
An Example
Magicians have a strong advantage because they use common - or even borrowed - items to do surprising things in their performances. I use oranges, a cup, markers, borrowed money, playing cards, and even dental floss in my performances.
The magic I do is emotionally compelling stuff. For instance, I change a $1 bill to a $100 bill, tapping into emotions that connect to hope, wealth, security, and prosperity. While I do this, I might talk about how investing with my client helped someone pay for their daughter’s college tuition (a common problem that many investors face).
Every time someone sees a dollar bill later, it triggers a memory of the magic, my client’s event, and their brand message. They find themselves talking about the trick, reinforcing the brand experience in the minds.
Key Points to Remember
We’ve covered a lot of ground. So let’s quickly review.
The Critical Parts to A Successful Event
Create Important Emotions at Your Event
A). Create a sense of connection to the event, the things happening at the event, and the people at the event.
B). Inject the emotion of surprise into your event to make that emotion memorable.
2). Create a Story Your Guests Can Tell About Your Event
A). Make sure it’s a “first person” story your guests can tell about their experience.
B). Give them concrete details they can retell.
C). Create a trigger that will bring the memory back later.
These five simple ideas will make sure that people remember your event for years to come, and - more importantly - they tell other people about it.
Just released: Mike Duseberg reveals all the “how to” steps to creating events that create sales referrals, and repeat business in his third booklet The Event ROI Revolution: A Planners Guide to Hospitality Events that Create Connections, Build Rapport, and Schedule Sales Appointments. Download your complimentary copy here.